Happy New Year!

Ah….a new year….and what a change already. For the first time in a long time I haven’t been glad to see the back of it. 2014 was good to me, on the whole. It began somewhat dubiously but ended on a high with new additions to my life that have come to mean a lot.

2014 saw a romance, albeit brief; friendships lost; friendships gained; the long awaited finality of an insurance claim; a nice amount of saved earnings putting me well on my way to having a deposit for when I buy my first property (hopefully this year); my Mum beating cancer down again; my first holiday in years…..all sorts of things. Pretty awesome! And I am excited. Excited about my future. Even though I still have no clue what I’m meant to be doing! It will come, all in good time.

The best thing to come from last year is a new level of peace. I am happy in myself right now. I have a good head on my shoulders; I’m under no illusion that the peace could be shattered at any moment, so it’s worth being thankful for every day that passes without a scrape, and thankful I am.

Today, for some reason, I found myself being excited about love. There’s no-one special in my life at the moment, no-one remotely of potential for holding my interest, yet I’m still excited! I think it’s because, deep down, I have faith that I will find the absolute one. And it doesn’t matter how long it takes anymore. Even if I found her on my dying day, it would be utterly worth it, just to feel that all consuming, all powerful love….the real thing. I have had love in my life but not the love of my life. She is out there. Somewhere. Going about her day. Maybe hoping to meet ‘me’ too. Wondering when she is going to meet the one to be bamboozled by. How can that be anything other than exciting?! It seems impossible from time to time, but I remain inspired by the notion.

Workwise, I have three months left of my contract and then I am to be set free….who knows where I’ll end up. I know where I’m hoping to be, but time will tell. Frankly, I can’t wait! Although it will be a painful day in March when I pack up and leave….there will be tears. I love them all, it has been a distinct pleasure to be back in that family.

Whatever happens to you this year, may you all be blessed with success and thank you for taking time out to read my little bloggy.

Sending love,

Joey
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Amore Day!!!!

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Ah….Valentine’s Day…….the mere thought of it puts a bright smile on my face and a warmth in my heart. ♥

I took myself out for a walk this evening; ran a couple of errands and thought I’d walk to the 24hour supermarket to treat myself.  Now, I don’t mind telling you that I bought myself a very luxurious box of chocolates, a bottle of Disaronno (to be consumed in moderation, unlike the chocolates) and some cute Valentine’s Day paraphernalia.   I would have bought flowers, but alas, I was too late and they had sold out, still I can get some when I return home on Sunday.  🙂

This is my first Valentine’s as a single girl again.  I had two with my last partner (N); the first one, well we were ‘together’ but not together….if you know what I mean. 😉   By the time the next Valentine’s Day came around, we were serious and oh how the gifts were showered!  ‘Twas a lovely time.  Prior to her I’d been on my own for five years. 

Those five years before N were very bitter ones.  I boycotted every Valentine’s Day because I was embroiled in my own self pitying, bitter resentment at being rejected by D, after seven years together.  I hated that she was with someone and I wasn’t.  I hated that I loved so much but had no-one to give it to.  I immersed myself in my own tragedy.  Shame on me.

Now, though, as I find myself single again and, despite the face that N is, presumably, still with the person she got with after me; I find that I have absolutely no bitterness, no resentment, no animosity towards love, or towards any individual.  Instead I am really excited about the day ahead!!  I know that sounds daft, but you see, I have so much love in me……….and that is all I feel.  Love.  I appreciate everything that I had when I was part of a couple.  I may no longer be in love, but nothing can ever take away the Valentine’s Days that I have been lucky enough to share.  And as singletons, why shouldn’t we treat ourselves on occasions like this?  I realise buying yourself a gift is no comparison to receiving one, nor is it compensation for not having anyone to buy for; but, quite frankly, a girl should not have to go without!!

I’m excited for all the couples out there who get to indulge in the romance of it all.  There is nothing greater than being with the one you love, on any day of the year, but Valentine’s….just has that little something extra special.

One day, I may get my perfect Valentine’s, with the one I love……being whisked off to Paris maybe……………..ah oui, mon amour!!!!  But until then, or if maybe it never happens, at least there is no more bitterness left in me.  I can’t wait to see the abundance of love all around tomorrow.

Whether single, or taken, enjoy the wonderful day ahead.

With lots of love,

JG

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